I started sobbing on my meditation block this morning, which was something I had not done ever before.

Yes, I sometimes sit there distracted in thought. Occasionally I will get sleepy and my head feels heavy. Other times I feel a tightness pinching underneath my right scapula. All things I have dealt with and continued on with meditation practice in the past. Today, having tears streaming down my face as I attempted to meditate- now that was something new.

Why was I crying?

Right before I sat down on my block, I had made the call. My dog, Reggie, will be put down tomorrow evening. It sounded so final reverberating in my brain “Tuesday, 6:20 pm”. That is that.

While those who have been following my work know it has been a long, hard journey with Reggie- what has not always been shared was the absolute pain this poor dog’s spirit has been in. Completely anxious, overwhelmingly afraid and uncomfortable at every moment in his own skin.

So this post actually is not just about my dog and his final resting place. It is about what happened on the block today and how lessons from meditation practice can be applied to our nursing careers. Here’s how:

• I was so distracted. Tears were flowing from my closed eyes. I desired the peace and calm that meditation practice can provide. So I continued to sit and let the thoughts go. As quickly as they came, one by one, I gently released them. The actual moment with my dog was not happening right now so why ruminate on it? Let go. Let go. Let go. Be in the moment.
• I used the breath. Meditation can help us during any challenge, obstacle or difficulty. Find yourself with a dying patient, an angry family member or a client who just relapsed yet another time- you can flow with the process of nursing with the breath. Inhalation invites something new and life affirming. Exhalation releases what no longer serves. Having a moment where you feel like crying? Breathe and let go.
• Allow the feelings to flow through you. Instead of pushing them down, pretending like they are not happening or fighting against them and putting on the brave face of nursing- feel the feeling. Tears are cleansing. Anger can be change provoking. Feelings are like the tide. They will not last. They come and go with the cycles of the moon. Let go, breathe and feel the flow.

I actually got through my meditation practice this morning. And it helped. My tears gently ended. My mind stilled. I sat with my breath. And the most amazing thing happened… I had a meditation like none other before. More peaceful and quiet than ever. A practice of observing and noticing. Even watching my body from the outside in (as odd as that may sound).

We have stressful moments in our nursing careers. We live through challenging situations in our personal lives. We experience great joy, devastating loss and terrible fear. These things ebb and flow. Tears are normal in nursing. They are a part of living and life.

Rather than fighting against the feelings use the process of letting go with the breath to allow you to flow through the beauty of life.

I’d love to hear your thoughts. Go ahead and leave a comment, question or reflection below. Thank you for reading and enjoy your health today.