I reversed my swan dive, coming up to complete my sun salutation. I was on the verge of tears. Yes. I had missed this feeling.
Total peace. Presence. Surrender.
The feeling that all was right with the world, my world, and that I fit perfectly inside of and all around it.
Last night I was back on my Yoga mat.
As I had shared in yesterday’s blog post, I haven’t been keeping up with my physical movement. Well, other than dancing my face off a lot more than usual at some dance medicine classes, at some kick-ass live moe. shows and in my own living room, basement and car.
Yesterday I made the conscious choice.
Not to sit on the couch, in front of the television, playing solitaire. It was hard. When my husband looked at me with a frown and said, “I just got home. And now you’re leaving the room?” I had to be strong.
I chose me.
My body. What I would feel like during the practice and afterwards. Joining back with the tranquility of the breath. Feeling the power. The strength in my arms as I Chaturanga’ed through Dandasana.
It was great.
Now I’m not sure when- was it before, during or after- that I contemplated the moral of this post… but here it goes…
Why didn’t I return to the mat sooner?
My fall class ended in early December. They gave out the registration forms for the January class; how come I didn’t sign up?
- Was it because my husband keeps telling me we are going to get a copy of P90X from his friend and actually exercise together?
- Was it because I had actually gotten bored and started to take my Yoga practice for granted?
- Was it that I metabolize things very quickly and, unfortunately as it has happened many time before, I moved on from my infatuation with my current teacher?
- Was it that I was scared I ‘forgot’ how to do Yoga and wouldn’t be able to practice at all?
- Was it I feared how weak I had become and was silently cursing myself and my body?
My response: all of the above.
Let’s tackle these in a brevity of response, in case any of the previous paralyzations of procrastination have fallen in your lap as well:
- I might as well keep on waiting for my husband to get the P90X from his friend; if I gave that as the ‘reason’ for not getting back into exercise… well, I’d still be sitting on the couch in May. You can’t depend on other people to get you up and moving. You’ve got to do it for yourself!
- If you’re bored, sick of or not enjoying the exercise anymore; it’s OK and totally normal to move on. Avoid finding yourself in a ‘rut’. Change things up once in a while. Do what your body is calling you to do. And this can be applied to any healthy habit of your choice.
- Forgetting, weakness, not doing it right, or any of the insanity that goes on in our conscious minds is all nonsense. Who cares if you don’t do it perfectly? It doesn’t matter if it’s not ‘right’. The important thing is that you are enjoying yourself and doing something healthy for your mind-body-spirit. Don’t let your ego get in the way of what your authentic self really wants to do.
Let’s hear from you! How does it feel to get back into a healthy habit? Why might you be putting it off? Can we help you move from procrastination paralyzation into healthy action? Leave a comment below and by all means, go ahead and share this post using the social media buttons on the screen. Enjoy your health today. Thank you!